Now I See

Revelations 15:1-8

“I (John) saw in heaven another great and marvelous sign: seven angels with the seven last plagues – last, because with them GOD’s wrath is complete.”

I was always a bit nervous, a bit unwilling to read or discuss Revelations. People say it’s about the last days, the last days of what we call earth, life, consciousness. Some pastors, priests, “people in the know” say GOD’s wrath is near, repent now or GOD’s wrath will be upon us.

There are times in my life when I dwell on the darkness in my life, more in the past than now. At times, it seems, the more I read in the bible, the less I know. Like Michael Franti sings “the more I see the less I know, but I know, one thing, that I love you!”

My mom had darkness in her life when I was 13 to 18 years old and she hurt me… she hurt me bad. I don’t know why she did it, but 34 years later I love my mom, not a hesitant love, not just the 4th commandment honor thy mother love, but a love that has me pick up the phone and call her love, a love that I wonder and look forward to seeing her again love. I don’t know why or how it happened, but I know, one thing, that I love her!

My dad was strict, but not mean. He would punish me, but not inflict injury. He didn’t want to hurt me. We loved each other, but we didn’t hug. In some way, we were both infants when it came to expressing love. We wanted it, but it wasn’t something that came natural, it took work. My dad died in my arms, literally. My sister was rubbing his feet, my mom was holding his left hand and I was holding his right hand and rubbing his head when he died, when he breathed his last. This may seem like a dark point in my life, but it was as far from darkness as I could ever imagine. It was beautiful, wonderful, awesome. I don’t know why or how, but I know, one thing, that I love him!

There’s a story in the new testament (John 9) where Jesus heals a blind man and the blind man goes off and tells everyone in his village about how this man, Jesus, gave him sight. The Pharisees, the teachers of the law, ask him how he did it, what happened exactly, why him…You know, the questions we want answers to… and the blind man says, I don’t know, I was blind, but now I see. When the blind man gained his sight, it doesn’t say he became a great prophet and knew everything, it doesn’t say he went out and judged the people who didn’t help him when he was blind. The blind man, with a depth of wisdom says… “I was blind, but now I see.”

There is a lot of fear, uncertainty, and doubt in our world which can lead me to being freaked out, insecure, neurotic, and emotional. The more I read the bible, the more I work on my relationships, the more I let go of what happened, why it happened, the less I know or worry about… but I know, one thing, that GOD loves me!

Precious Father, Loving God, Holy Spirit, Help us to realize and share in the wisdom of the blind man. Help us to know one thing- that GOD loves us and that is all that matters! AMEN and AMEN!

Jim Dietvorst

Check out Day 18 of our 24 Days of Books - today's book recommendation is
Get a Life!: It Is All About You by Reggie McNeal. Read more about it and see all the other books recommended so far by clicking here!

1 comment (Add your own)

1. Julie wrote:
Thank you Jim for this precious look in to your walk in faith. What a beautiful way to remember to take a look into my own life and see God's love. I was lost and now I am found! God Bless, Julie

Sat, December 19, 2009 @ 7:27 AM

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