Love By Choice

Dear Romantics,

I am in between wedding trips. I was blessed last weekend to officiate the ceremony of Karl Nickoley and his new bride Taylor (Maas) Nickoley.

Now I am prepping to do the wedding of my niece Anna Greenwald and Nate Towne this Memorial Day weekend.

I have long been fascinated by how in a Christian wedding service, the pastor never asks the couple, "Karl do you love Taylor?” Rather, the question is, "Nate will you love Anna?” Christian love is not a feeling that you either have or you don’t. Christian love, at least in the context of our services of holy matrimony, is an act of the will, something you decide to do. Something you have faith that Christ provides now, and in the future. Apparently, human feelings have had little to do with the matter at least by how we design our services.

The hard work of marriage involves the choice to love, even when one doesn’t feel like loving the other. Here are some useful insights regarding the choice to love:

“There is no remedy for love but to love more.” ~ Henry David Thoreau

“Love is not blind—it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less.”                         ~ Rabbi Julius Gordon

“Marriage is the highest state of friendship: If happy, it lessons our cares by dividing them, at the same time that it doubles our pleasures by mutual participation.” ~ Samuel Richardson

“The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances : if there is any reaction, both are transformed.” ~ Carl Jung

“Marriage is one long conversation, checkered by disputes.”~Robert Louis Stevenson

“I just cannot understand my wife. She knows everything about me . And still she loves me.”           ~Morris Hayes

Prayer: For Nate Town and Anna Greenwald. Karl and Taylor Nickoley. The group preparing to go to Nicaragua- Terry Luce, Jude Delhierro, Conor Evans, Glennda Nelson, Andrea Heshmati, Lois Autterson, Brad Corrigan, Daisy Wiberg, Love Light & Melody and Pastor Dave.

Still in one peace,

Pastor David J. Jensen


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